I think I speak for every mom when I say it's hard to find some me-time while taking care of a kid. And I'm kind of used to that, but lately, Melissa's new self-sufficiency is making me a little confused.I expect her to be clingy. I expect her to want me ALL THE TIME. But what I wasn't expecting was for her to want my ATTENTION all the time, not necessarily me.
She's at the exploring age, so of course she wants to go everywhere and do everything she's not supposed to. I never thought I'd miss the days when she'd cry if I left the room. I mean, I don't miss the crying, but I do wish she'd be more willing to follow me. Now it's like, if momma wants me to go somewhere, therefore the opposite direction must be more interesting.
When I try to pick her up, she uses her own weight down to get away (unless she believes I'll take her to something she wants, like food). I know this is supposed to be expected - after all, terrible two's are just around the corner, right? But the times that puzzle me are when I try to interact with her and she literaly pushes me away, as if I'm interrupting her imagination. Like, "momma, I'm pretending to be [whatever] here, and there's no space for the gigantic mother in this story".
Don't get me wrong, we play together a lot. She's still very sweet and LOVES hugs. Then it's "thank you, bye" (she says it exactly like this :), and off she goes to destroy the house. So I think I'm allowed to go do something else, and that gives her the cue to be extra clingy again.
I'm confused. I try to squeeze in mommy-times here and there, but feel guilty to let her play by herself for too long. Then if I try to join her, she sometimes acts like I'm not doing it right. My guilty mommy-brain starts thinking that it's because she resents me, and I should never have opened the computer in the first place.
Does anyone out there feels this way? When do you know you're entitled to some mommy time, and not just neglecting your child? I know that they're supposed to play a little bit on their own, but I don't want to use this as an excuse to not give her attention. When I'm typing, I'm in my own world. Then she demands I close the computer, gives me a hug and proceeds to ignore me. What's up with that?