I've been meaning to blog for days but can't seem to think straight enough to compose a post. I mean, not that my brain has been top notch throughout this pregnancy, but lately I've reached new shades of crazy.
For starters, I cry for EVERYTHING. If I can't find something I'm looking for and desperately need, if Andrew throws his toothbrush in an unreachable place for the millionth time, or if the lady on "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" talks about how she really didn't know she was pregnant :). In other words, I'm a mess.
But there's a silver lining to this mess. It's like, the reason for my breakdowns is that I'm hyper sensitive, which makes good moments that much more wonderful. I can cry out of happiness and then out of desperation within a matter of hours (or minutes). The thought even crossed my mind that I might be bipolar, but one look down my bulging belly reminds me of the culprit :).
An example - after waiting FOREVER to be seen at the eye doctor, I grabbed my prescription for now triple-vision glasses (gosh, I feel like an old lady) and headed to the store next door. There, they took another eternity, and then after everything was finally ready to go, I was reminded that it'll take a WHOLE WEEK before I can see straight again. I'd forgotten I've been spoiled by those "glasses in 2 hours" kind of stores, and that literally broke my heart. Having waited now about 2 hours total, I decided to just bite the bullet and do it. But this was enough to excuse myself to the restroom and just cry my eyes out. You'd think they'd just shot my puppy.
Now, interesting thing is, I had a GREAT rest of the night lol. Of course I didn't bounce back immediately, but dinner at Johnny Carino's, followed by 2 Cadbury eggs in front of the TV was all I needed. The world was nice again :). I even had a good night of sleep and woke up feeling better than I had in awhile. I guess at this point my brain is starting to figure out that my usual impression that the world is ending shouldn't be taken all that seriously.
I called this post "Nesting Pregzilla" because I think the core reason for my craziness (aside from fluctuating hormones) is that I REALLY want to get ready for this baby. I wish I had unlimited money to just go on a shopping spree. The possibilities of what I could want/need once Holly comes makes me feel ADD - like, there's always something else to do, something else I should be taking care of.
And it annoys me that the world isn't as crazy! :) That no one is seeing the urgent, life-or-death need for me to decorate the nursery right now. Or keep the house spotless and the kids behaving perfectly so I'll know for sure I'm ready for Holly. I realize this doesn't make too much sense (I mean, WHEN are the house and the kids going to be perfect??), but even that rationalization annoys me too lol.
So in the spirit of my nesting hunger, here's the wallpaper and paint to go on Holly's room (only one wall will have wallpaper, the rest will be painted):
As you can sort of tell, they haven't been purchased yet. I chose them before going to Brazil, and now that I'm back I can't wait to start this thing already! Life's just been too busy, and we still need to measure the room's walls. But at least I know what's chosen. If I hadn't, who knows, I might've been even crazier, and that's not good for anybody :).