Thursday, May 27, 2010

A Different Kind of Bored

Hi everybody,

Please don't misunderstand the name of this blog; I'm NOT saying that moms have NORMAL boredom. Normal boredom, as we used to know, is pretty much dead. As in, wondering what purpose your life/day has. My days now have been full of purpose, and it's amazing to have the responsability to raise a gorgeous little girl. It must sound scary to a childless person, like it was to me, but it is really a magical experience. All the cheesy comercials are true :).

But the kind of boredom I'm talking about is when, as much as you're in love with your child, you feel like you NEED to fill your mind with something else. To recharge your batteries, and remind yourself that you're still a person, and not just someone's mom/wife. So as the baby naps, you watch tv, surf the net and hope that this refreshment will come instantly, only it doesn't. You're supposed to be having you time, but your brain is fried by the new decibels that your baby just reached with her shrieks. And not just by the tough stuff. Her cuteness and amazingness can also keep your brain from functioning to anything other than said cuteness and amazingness. It's a vicious cicle, you know.

The childless/pregnant people reading this must be freaking out, thinking, "I don't want to lose my sense of identity!" Well, you do. At least you lose sight of who you were, and meet the new you. It's kinda scary at first, but then you get used to the new mommy you. And with time, you become really good friends :). I like the new mommy me, though I wish she'd lose a few pounds and worried less. But she's far more confident than I ever dreamed of being.

So this is where I'm at. Melissa will be 7 months the day after tomorrow and I can't believe how time flew. It almost feel normal now. Almost.


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